Literally Speaking: I Just Need a New Pair of Shoes

This weekend I decided to buy new running shoes. Normally I go to a store like Kohl’s where I can just pull the boxes off the shelf and try on as many pairs as I want and stare at the choices for endless minutes without the distraction of a salesperson wanting to chat me up.

But I’m living in a new city–one without a Kohl’s nearby (yes, change is hard)–so off to the mall I went. After some bitching and moaning about not finding exactly what I wanted in the few stores I grudgingly walked through (it’s not like Kohl’s! everything’s different!), I discovered that Under Armour sells running shoes. I always wear Nikes but in the spirit of being less rigid, I decided to try something new.

The first pair of shoes I tried on weren’t right but I was determined to give this trying-something-new experiment a fair chance. I was studying the other choices when the salesdude came over to see if I wanted to try another pair.

salesdude: Did those not feel good?
me: They felt too stiff.
salesdude: What are you looking to do?
me: [slight pause while I try to process this apparent non sequitur then give up and go with the obvious] Buy shoes?
[nervous laughter: salesdude because he’s not sure if I’m joking, me because I know by his reaction that I’ve missed something obvious]
salesdude: I mean, like, are you going to use them for crosstraining, running–
me: Yes! Running! [and off I went on a dissertation about what I like in a running shoe]

The pause, the uncertain answer, the literal interpretation of an unexpected, off-script question–these are things that unmask me to strangers. One minute I’m the average customer and the next I’m the oddball who can’t answer a simple question and cares a little too much about how the soles of her running shoes are constructed.

But overall, in spite of the mall-induced crankiness, the shopping was a success because I got a new pair of these and I love them:

8 thoughts on “Literally Speaking: I Just Need a New Pair of Shoes”

  1. Cool!! You are a runner as well?? So am I! I haven’t been running for long, but I LOVE it! Also, I can again, totally relate to this post! Just the other day someone asked me a question and I had to stop and search my mind in an attempt to figure out exactly what it was she really wanted to know. Thankfully, she saw my confusion and rephrased the question for me. Too bad not everyone is that able to discern when an Aspie is lost! LOL

    1. I am. I’ve been a runner since I wrecked my knee and had reconstructive surgery. Sounds crazy but it works for me.

      It’s always nice when someone rephrases instead of repeating the exact same question that I’m clearly not comprehending. 🙂

      1. How do you run? Weird? The reason I’m asking is because my Aspies paralysis very much extends to the physical and I have been obese (usually morbidly) my whole live. It physically hurts and exhausts me to do the musts (lifting people & tending to household duties at work and home), So voluntary exercise alludes me. You may not know how to help with this, since you may have never had this problem, which I would understand. I would also like to hear from anyone reading who has experienced this.

        1. I have a serious biological need to be in motion. If I can’t/don’t exercise regularly my moods get all out of whack and I start to feel miserable. Which is, of course, no help in answering your question. Hopefully someone else will see this and answer it.

  2. Sorry, this is a new comment on an old post…but I loved the “slight pause while I try to process this apparent non sequitur then give up and go with the obvious…” I went camping this summer and one of my neighbor’s was chatting with me about my old Dodge truck. Then they asked, “So how’d you get here?”
    “The Dodge,” I said.
    “HAA! No, I mean, what brought you here?”
    “The Dodge?…ohhhh…”

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